October: Stepping into the Desert
Opening Letter from Dr. Anita
Happy October Friends of the Pause. This might very well be my favorite month in my favorite season. The heat of summer has passed, routines are re-established and we transition with a spectacle of color, pumpkin spice and apple cider donuts. Transition time. October also hosts World Menopause Day and Breast Cancer Awareness Month. You know the drill, early detection saves lives- true statement. Know your anatomy and any changes to your breasts or armpits, nipple changes- like if one retracts that didn’t used to or nipple discharge. If you or your partner notices any of these changes, get evaluated even if you had a mammogram recently. October 18th is World Menopause Day, share your story, talk to your friends, your doctor, your partner about what you are noticing and experiencing about this phase of life, what is working, what isn’t. Ask for what you want, for what you need, take care of yourself and each other.
The Man Will Burn
This summer I closed for about a week and journeyed West with my husband to the Black Rock desert in Nevada. We flew into Salt Lake, picked up our RV rental and drove 12 hours. We found ourselves in four lanes of vehicles backed up for three hours at the gate and finally gained entry at 3am after a ticket check and inspection for stowaways and forbidden items like styrofoam, sequins and plants. We rang a bell and made our way to 7:45 and A. So began our week at Burning Man. There’s a lot out there regarding Burning Man, is it Over, is it commodified with influencers. It was my first time so this is a fresh, beginner’s mind perspective. They say it is either Life changing or horrible. I’m still processing this experience of living in community with 70,000 others who abide by Ten Principles which are: Radical Inclusion, Decommodification- you can’t buy anything, there is no corporate sponsorship, Gifting, Radical Self-Reliance, Communal Effort, Radical Self-Expression, Civic Responsibility, Leaving No Trace, Participation and Immediacy. The community is incredible, next level. As is the art.
Three huge structures are built and burned at the end of the week. There was a Titanic burn Friday, The Man on Saturday and the Temple on Sunday. Check out youtube for what these were like- epic. Watch the burns on YouTube
There are plenty of other installations too surfacing out of the desert. Art cars and Mutant vehicles roam the playa at night like bioluminescent algae with insane sound systems and Djs, maybe Burlesque dancers too or Goth battles in front of a flaming octopus. There is music everywhere, at all times just like the dust, I don’t think it stopped until the rain came on Thursday and shut down Black Rock City for a while and the mud dried and made the roads passable. There are orchestras and a marching band with a flaming tuba. There is an ultramarathon, desert hospitality by a tech billionaire who spoons saffron into your mouth as an offering, an airport with a tower built and then deconstructed at the end of the week. Leave no trace. And everyone got along, I saw no brawls, arguments or fighting. It was more civilized than a Badger game. What sits with me most is Radical Self Expression. Anything goes on the playa- clothes, no clothes, fishnets and fur- great! Strip geography trivia- yes please-and I lost my shirt. It was a question about Greenland. During all this l realized how much I hold back out of fear, fear of judgement.
At 56 I was far from the youngest or the oldest Burner and I thought I could hold and honor my body for all it has done and been through. I mean it’s done stuff that I’m pretty proud of: like growing and birthing three children, cancer, surgeries, chemo and I mean I rode over the Rocky Mountains too. This body is bad ass and yet it was hard for me to be in it and “out there”. I’m not the hot body I might have been in my 20’s and I felt Shame and wrong for not holding the gaze of approval for that. Not tight enough and “not worth looking at”. That was a hard realization. I think it came from my original programming of “look good and be desirable”. I think the playa, the heat, the dust, the energy, light and sound re-booted me to a 3.0 program. A place of acceptance for who and where I am, now. Present. Now I move to honor this body, and push it to show me what it can do. I’m here to get after it and honor this temple for being my companion and escorting me on the planet. I also honor and celebrate those hot bodies, those in the fishnets and fur. Have a blast out there on the Playa gang! One thing Burning Man makes crystal clear: This. Is. All. Temporary. The Playa is ageless and if I may anthropomorphize it, probably gazes with humor at all the silly humans in the desert disco. We are here for the briefest of time. A speck of dust to this desert. This era, this phase will end, so we might as well have fun! See you next year on the Playa!
Closing
It's been one year since Pause Medicine opened its doors in October 2025. It started as a thought and manifested into a space where we gather to be heard, to heal, to learn, to transform and to also relax and downregulate in a SoundBath or a SoundSelf session. I’m so grateful for the support of my husband, Jaclyn who does my social media, my friends, my mentors and the community who believes in this possibility. I’m learning and growing and plan to further my reach and scope.
